“Home-wreckers” are often women that married men have affairs with, right? Do you know who is really to blame in these scenarios? The cheating spouse. People shouldn’t blame the stranger simply because it’s easier than addressing the cheating of the partner. Who is the one who is definitely acting immorally? The cheater. End of story.

I don’t have any broad moral bones to pick with the third parties, especially as I don’t know where they are coming from. Maybe that person has no idea what the situation involves, maybe that person does know. I don’t think it matters at the end of the day. When a spouse cheats, there is definitely something dishonest happening. Situations of cheating can easily get messy and complicated, but I think that generally the third party did not instigate the home-wrecky-ness.

Because this scenario is common with a married man cheating on his wife with another woman, the fact that the other woman is blamed by society feels a little slut-shame-y to me. I cannot articulate why it feels this way other than that the societal blame is being put on the woman, the other, rather than the man and his cheating. This doesn’t feel right. It’s always easier to blame the scapegoat, but that doesn’t make it okay. xoxo